crazygrampastuey's Xanga

The most difficult people in the world to shop for

Wed, 16 Dec 2009 22:38:30 GMT

…..have to be the “Grandmas” of the world - the little old ladies who gave birth to our parents and spoil us rotten.

I felt like I should contribute more to the “Gift-giving” part of Christmas this year now that I’m well into the “adult” phase of my life. And Grandma made the top of my list (after mom & my brother) of people I felt I needed to get a gift for. I figured this would be a way of paying her back for all the times she secretly gave me money / bought me things simply because I wanted it.

But have you ever tried shopping for your Grandma? I have no idea what to get her.

Not only are they the most selfless people I’ve ever met who refuse to give you any ideas because they “don’t want to be any trouble,” but they are also the least materialistic type of people in the world.

Grandmas don’t really watch anything on DVD or Blu-Ray.
Grandmas don’t listen to CDs or download MP3s
Grandmas have lived a long time and have probably asked for everything they could ever want last Christmas.

This is what Google suggests I give my Grandma:

a shirt

soap

A box (?)

A plate of some kind

Personalized Coffee mug

No wonder Grandmas never want you to buy them something…..!

The only time I’ve ever seen my Grandma grateful for receiving a gift is when it was something I made in “Arts & Crafts.” Don’t think I could pull that off this year, though….!

I’m currently browsing this pretty good “How to buy Grandmother a Gift” website and oneidea that it had was to try and add to any collections she might have. (A common Grandma trait)

What I plan to tell my kids about Santa Claus

Wed, 09 Dec 2009 17:23:40 GMT

On the off-chance that I ever have kids, I will definitely be looking forward to having that ‘talk’ about the existence of Santa Claus.

All right, you wanna know the truth?

Santa’s dead.

Yup, died years ago, long before you were ever born.

I mean, come on – Christmas has been around since…..forever, right? He’d be over a hundred years old if he were still alive. Nobody lives that long, especially not a guy who lives off of milk and cookies.

See, he worked himself to death. Just like the guy in that movie, Amadeus.

You’ve never seen Amadeus? We’ll watch it on your birthday.

But see, after he died the world’s top Christian scientists got together and cloned him. Multiple times. Cuz they, like we all do, wanted Santa to be around forever.

So you see that guy in the mall there really is Santa; he’s just not the original Santa.

Are you following me so far?

But see, these clone Santas don’t really know that they’re clones - they all think they’re the original. And if they found out, they wouldn’t be able to handle it. Something about realizing you’re a clone makes you crazy, I guess. But what this means is that you can never tell them any of this, okay?

None of this “you’re not the real Santa” or “my dad says you’re a clone,”, okay? Cuz if you do, they will go bat-shit crazy and start killing everyone.

And it’ll be all your fault.

No, I am not making this up. Now good night and sweet dreams.

Yea?

No. The reindeer & elves died too. The Santas use Federal Express now.

Guerrilla Christmas Tree Decorations!

Mon, 07 Dec 2009 19:08:23 GMT

So there are a bunch of pine trees out on this public sidewalk where I go jogging.

As I was huffing past them last week, I noticed that a couple of people putting decorations on some of them.

I thought that was pretty cool.

Granted, they're not the greatest-looking trees out there, but I thought it was a pretty neat thing to do so I took a few pictures of them this weekend to show you all.

Pretty cool way to help get people into the season!

What does Christmas mean for Non-Christian Cultures?

Thu, 03 Dec 2009 16:51:26 GMT

So here’s something about Christmas that I didn’t really give a lot of thought to until just recently.

I was with a couple of friends last night and someone jokingly asked what the true meaning of Christmas was.

After the laughter died down, (because it’s so obvious, amIrite?) we somehow (and I’m still not sure how this happened) started seriously discussing this topic.

“Well, it depends on who you ask,” etc. etc.

The topic quickly moved to discussing how Christmas means different things to different cultures: while it’s pretty obvious why most Christian cultures celebrate Christmas, we concluded that there are probably other non-christian cultures that also celebrate Christmas for completely different reasons, with completely different traditions.

For some reason, I doubt the "Who's" are Christian

The only real example I can think of is Japan.

I asked Fred (who currently lives in Japan and is therefore my only really accurate resource on the subject) about this and he told me that the holiday is is largely marketed as a couples' holiday (like Valentine's Day); they go out for dinner and exchange gifts on Christmas Day at popular/upscale restaurants that start booking that night several months in advance. Apparently, a lot of people buy "Christmas cakes" that need to be ordered weeks in advance. Some families stop giving their kids gifts after they reach 10 years old. And most families don’t buy Christmas trees.

And while most Japanese know that Christmas is about giving / receiving gifts, they don’t know why or even how the holiday originated.

Anyway, this got me wondering how Christians feel about this “evolution” of the Holiday. I mean, it’s one thing to see Corporations turn Christmas into the biggest Shopping frenzy of the year, but what about these other interpretation of Christmas by largely non-Christian cultures?

Are they offended by this?
Are they glad that a such Christian tradition has become so popular?
Does it even matter to them?

I wasn’t raised a Christian in the slightest, so I’m pretty clueless about all this (I was thoroughly weirded out during Lent when I saw a bunch of people with dark smudges on their foreheads) and my curiosity is always piqued in these matters.

ANOTHER GREAT DEBATE

Tue, 01 Dec 2009 16:31:17 GMT

Which do you have (for everyday use) and why?

A Backpack……..

Or a Messenger Bag?

Discuss.

(And I'm not talking about "laptop bags," they do not count as 'owning a messenger bag')

Something I am really thankful for

Tue, 24 Nov 2009 22:12:07 GMT

Since it’s almost Thanksgiving, I thought I’d just write a post about something I recently realized that I’ve been taking for granted over the years….!

Along with my health, family, still having a job, etc. I am very thankful for the friends that I made in College.

These were the people that I spent a lot of time with, drinking at the parties that we used to throw (after I was 21, of course). And if there was one thing that I was not very good at during those days, it was holding my liquor.

……actually, I’m still pretty bad at that. (Damn you, Asian genes!)

(I know, I know, I'm adorable...!)

Anyway, during those occasional drifts in and out of consciousness, they made the effort to look out for and take care of me. And I don’t think a lot of other “friends” would have done that. More often than not, things like this had a tendency to happen:

So basically what I'm saying is "I’m thankful that my friends aren’t dicks," .......because a lot of guys have friends who are and they put up with it because.......that's just who their friends are.

I guess it’s not that great of a thing to be thankful for, so lemme rephrase: I’m really grateful for the people I became friends with in College and I just thought I would post this so they would know.

……..not that many of them read this, though.

What's everyone else thankful for this year??

Another Word that's used too frequently....

Thu, 19 Nov 2009 22:24:20 GMT

You know what word I’m hearing a lot of these days?

AWESOME

Maybe it’s just me, but I hear that word tossed around waaaaay too frequently….and I think it’s due to the popularity of CBS’s “How I Met Your Mother”

Particular blame, though, goes to Neil Patrick Harris’ character – Barney Stinson. (who’s also responsible for bringing “legendary,” “suit-up,” & all sorts of “high-five” variations back into the pop culture vocabulary.

Now I don’t find anything wrong with the word, “awesome;” I think it’s a great word when appropriately (and sparingly) used. But a word like that – or any word, really – starts to lose its meaning when used too much.

So here are a few synonyms for the oft-spoke word which I hope people will use to help expand their not-so awesome vocabulary: (I’ve highlighted some of my favorites)

AWESOME: (also known as:)

alarming, astonishing, awe-inspiring, fearsome, formidable, frantic, frightening, grand, impressive, magnificent, majestic, mind-blowing*, moving, overwhelming, shocking, something else, striking, stunning, wonderful, wondrous, fascinating, incredible, bees knees, marvelous, prodigious, shocking, stunning, surprising, unbelievable, bang-up, capital, champion, excellent, fine, first-rate, fly, top, whiz-bang, boss, 10, A-1, A-OK, aces, astonishing, astounding, best, breathtaking, cool, extravagant, fab, fantastic, first-class, greatest, groovy, incredible, legendary, marvelous, mind-blowing, out-of-sight, outrageous, peachy, phenomenal, primo, prodigious, rad, remarkable, spectacular, striking, stupendous, super, superb, terrific, top drawer, tops, turn-on, unreal, wicked, cat's meow, far out, first-rate, great, gangsta, like wow, marvelous, out of sight, out of this world, primo, sensational, superb, steak sauce, pimp, out-of-this-world, shark (as in shark week on Discovery channel) etc.

And my personal favorite – batman (adj)

Example Sentence: “That new white convertible is totally batman.”

IN OTHER NEWS - you should check out this site called graphjam.com. It’s pretty Batman.

My Evil Twin (sort of)

Thu, 12 Nov 2009 17:21:27 GMT

I sort of have an “Evil twin” who works in the department next to mine. (Marketing)

I say “sort of” because this guy – let’s call him “Spock” – is not really evil; and he’s not really my twin, either.

We don’t really look alike;
We don’t really act alike;
He’s also a little bit older (and a little more successful) than me, so it’s not really that difficult to tell us apart.

He’s not even Asian….!

But he’s short (5ft 7in) with dark hair (like me) and I guess our heads are shaped the same way...so if you’re looking at both of us from behind, it’s very hard to tell us apart…….

…….because he always manages to wear the same outfit as me.

Every time I decide to wear my blue, long-sleeved shirt to work, he wears one that’s the exact same shade of blue.

Same thing with my striped, white long-sleeve shirt – he manages to wear it the exact same day that I do – EVERY SINGLE TIME.

I even went out and bought a few new shirts once, specifically to avoid this problem – didn’t help. (Guess we both shop at Target)

It’s uncanny…!

Now this should be creepyenough in and of itself, but lately, people have been mistaking me for him.

I’ve been tapped on the shoulder three times in the past week, only to hear “Sorry – I thought you were “Spock”.”

Now I don’t really talk to the guy very much (there’s not too much interaction between my dept. and his) so I’m not really sure how to approach him about this. “Hey – don’t shop at the same stores as me!” just seems rude, you know?

Guess I’ll have to go clothes-shopping again – this time at Macys….! (Although I hear Ross has some good deals!)

ANOTHER show for all the "Nerds" out there....!

Tue, 10 Nov 2009 21:00:17 GMT

Just a quick plug today about a show a friend of mine turned me on to called "The IT Crowd."

It's a show on the BBC that depicts the crazy lives of two nerdy IT technicians and their lovely, non-nerdy boss who knows absolutely nothing about computers.

This show reminds me a lot of The Big Bang Theory (one hot girl, two nerds) but I have to say that I like "The IT Crowd" better, mostly because of how surreal the show tends to get.

Here's a clip to help you understand what I mean:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1EBfxjSFAxQ
(Sorry, just have to put a link - someone disabled the embedding!)

And did you catch that opening sequence? The DVD has quite a few references like that

Their DVD chapter menu

Anyway, here's a few more clips from the show that I thought were pretty funny:

- Nerd photoshoot
- New Emergency number
- Their attempt to be "social."

And one more! (embedded)

"Never type 'google' into Google."

AFTER-HALLOWEEN Customers

Fri, 06 Nov 2009 20:28:53 GMT

I know I said I wouldn't post a new blog until next week - but what are you, my mother?

I passed by a Halloween shop on my way back from lunch and was surprised to see that it was still open, selling everything they still had at 50% off. I thought:

"This store is still open?"
"Why is this store still open?"
"Wouldn't it be smarter to just shut it down and open again next year? (like these stores usually do?)"

Curious, I took a look inside and briefly skimmed what was left of their once-ample selection. I was one of maybe three people in the store.

And this is when I asked myself what has become the reason I'm blogging right now:

What kind of people would shop in a Halloween Costume store AFTER Halloween??

I seriously pondered this question for a good five minutes and came up with the following list:

People getting an early start on NEXT Halloween
Costume Designers with no budget.
Live-Action Role Players
People who attend a lot of “Themed-Parties.”
Amusement Park employees
Drag Kings / Queens
Vigilantes (like Batman)
People who like to role-play “in the bedroom”
Renaissance Faire-goers
Fans of the "Rocky Horror Picture Show."

........and that’s all I could think of at the moment.

Can you add to this list, Xanga?
Who else might shop for Halloween stuff AFTER Halloween?